Thursday, September 07, 2006

Losing Someone

If anyone here has ever lost anyone then only they will know the true feeling and meaning of loss.

Losing someone is a pain that cannot be explained nor described, it is a pain that can only be felt and experienced by an individual.

When we lose those who are close to us it brings us much pain and grief; and if it a loss of a person we have been close to, someone we grew up with and spent most of our time with, then this pain multiplies and becomes harder to bear.

At this moment in time, a very true and close friend of mine is fighting for their life; lying in bed without any knowledge of what the future will hold.

Although no one ever wishes to lose someone, it is inevitable to think of what life would be like without someone so dear and so close. Losing such a close friend would be something that one may not get over throughout one's life.

These are the thoughts travelling through my head, whilst the heart prays and begs Allah for the recovery of such a great friend.

My request to all the readers for humble Du'as for my friend's speedy and complete recovery.


It is amazing how we grieve over the loss of a person that we have built a connection and bond with maybe over a period of twenty to thirty years. This bond then becomes stronger if that person is close to us, has done us favours and we have looked after them like our own.

If an individual can understand this bond created by one human for another human, how can we overlook the bond created by Allah for His bondsmen.

Allah personally created man, took care of him from the time he was in the womb till the day he reaches the grave and even after that. It is Allah that fed that person, clothed him, loved him and appointed angels to keep him safe. It is Him who created for him the tools and means to remove every difficulty; He created for him a partner to relieve his loneliness and become his companion.

What sort of a bond would be created by Allah with someone He has done this much favours upon? What love and care would Allah have for that person? So when such a servant turns away from Allah why is it that we fail to see His disappointment, His remorse and His reason to become angry despite given us chances upon chances.

An Incident

This reminds me of an incident that took place between Allah and Hadhrat Mussa عليه السلام. On one occasion, after having made every effort possible, Mussa عليه السلام turned to Allah and requested that his entire nation be destroyed as they did not take heed of his words and guidance.

Allah asked Mussa عليه السلام to make 40 clay pots with his bare hands before any action was taken. Although Mussa عليه السلام was unaware of the link between the making of the clay pots and his request to Allah he submitted to the command of Allah and began making clay pots with his own hands. Mussa عليه السلام put his entire effort into making these pots and completed making all forty, after which, he looked with delight towards what he had achieved.

Mussa عليه السلام then turned to Allah and informed him of completing the task Allah had set him. Allah then commanded Mussa عليه السلام to take a stick and break one pot after another. Mussa عليه السلام was astonished by this command but continued to obey the order of Allah. He slowly began breaking one pot after another bearing the pain in his heart for destroying what he had so carefully made.

After Mussa عليه السلام had finished destroying all the pots, Allah informed him, O Mussa (عليه السلام), you found great difficulty in breaking pots of clay that you made with your bare hands, yet it was you that asked me to destroy an entire nation that I myself created and moulded with my own hands. At this point Mussa عليه السلام realised what he had asked from Allah.


We feel the pain of our loss, we feel the pain of the destruction of our belongings and we feel our anger is justified towards one who is ungrateful towards us and our favours. Yet we fail to see Allah's disappointment and 'grief' when a servant that He created from His own hands turns away from Him; we fail to understand and justify His punishment for all the sins we commit and all the times we rebel against Him; we fail to see the sacrifices of His beloved Prophet صلي الله عليه و سلم. But we never fail to sacrifice our religion...

May Allah give us all the understanding to love Him in the manner He loves us. May He make us worthy of being His creation and may He make us worthy of being called His. May He give us the realisation of our acts and the harm and pain they cause and most important of all, may He accept us. Aameen.


Saj said...

Walaikum Salaam Warahmatullahi Wabarakatuh,

May Allah grant your friend a speedy and complete recovery, Aameen.

Subhana'Allah, the point you've made brought tears to my eyes, it's so true, similar thoughts were running through my mind earlier.

Aameen to all the Dua's in the post.

Jazak'Allah Khair for this lesson filled post.

Wasalaamu Alaikum Warahmatullahi Wabarakatuh

Ahmed said...

Mashallah a eyeopening post. Ameen to all the duas in the post and above.
I agree with Saj, upon reflection of the points you mention brings tears to the eyes.

Duah ma yhad.

Muslim said...

salamz,how comes u dint accept ma last comments about niqab?sorry if im bothering you,ill just look else where if someone else can help me,even tho ive tried and no one seems to be helping me much with the questions that i got......jazakAllah anyway.yea gr8 post mashaAllah.Whats up with stating in the comments that the post brought you to tears?is it allowed to mention that?i once read that some shaykhs and alims when they give bayans and they start to cry,they dont tell anyone that there crying but they tell them that they got a cold or something gone in their eyes.
my comment on the other blog werent accpeted either and it seem the ones on this blog aint getting accepted either,thats ok,maybe somethings wrong with ma commenting system or my internet connection.forgive me if i said something wrong or the fact that i ask too many forgive me ok,ill try somewhere else.hope your illnesses get better,inshaAllah,salams.

mujahidah an nafs said...

Assalamu alaikum wa rahmatullah,

O Allah, remove all harm, O Lord of the people! Cure him for You are the curer. There is none that gives cure except You. Cure that leaves no sickness at all.

May Allah Ta'ala grant your dear friend complete shifaa, May Allah Ta'ala grant you with sabr during this difficult time. Ameen.

Duas requested

Wassalamu alaikum wa rahmatullah

Anonymous said...

Sometimes we develop such an attachment to the people that we love that imagining life without them doesn't only seem impossible but does become impossible..

At times like these we have no alternative but to turn to Allah Ta'ala for He is the one who gives and takes..

The human fitra is to love and to be loved but to sacrifice as we all know is something that holds great reward as did Ibrahim (AS) when he was commanded by Allah Ta'ala to sacrifice Ismail (AS)

May Allah Ta'ala grant you great sabr during this time, it's not easy to loose someone that means so much to you...

Zain said...

As Salaamu Alaykum,

Sister Sajeda

Jazakallah for the comments and Aameen to the Du'as. May Allah accept them and make them the means for my friend's speedy and complete recovery.

Please remember me in your Du'as also.

Brother Ahmed

Jazakallah brother Ahmed for the comments and Du'as. I pray that all is well with you and that you are in the best of health and Imaan.

Please do continue to remember me and my friend in your humble Du'as in these days of great virtues.


First of all, I apologise for the delay in accepting your questions. I have been tied up with a few matters and also health issues. You can now see the previous post where your questions have been accepted and Insha Allah you should receive an answer for them during this week.

The Prophet of Allah صلي الله عليه و سلم has mentioned that asking questions is half of knowledge. Meaning a person who asks questions will gain much knowledge. I once again apologise for the delay in answering the questions, and I pray that you will continue to ask questions and acquire the answers for them.

And as regards to not displaying or notifying someone of your tears it depends on individuals. The Prophet of Allah صلي الله عليه و سلم has said that indeed the slightest of show is regarded as Shirk.

This is for that person who performs an act to show someone else. But if a person informs another of his acts or how he felt in order for encouragement or as a general talk then there is no harm in doing so.

And Allah Knows Best.

Sister Mujahidah

Jazakallah for passing by and Ameen to all the Du'as. May Allah accept them and accept all your Du'as also. Aameen.


Indeed Allah asks us to make many sacrifices and He burdens us not with that which we are unable to take the burden of. May Allah make us those servants of His who readily sacrifice everything for His sake and His happiness. Aameen.

Du'as Requested.


Umm Zahra said...

Assalamualaykum warahmatullah,

I pray that your and your loved ones are in good health insha'Allah. I pray that He grants your friend complete shifaa and ease in their suffering.

Ameen to all the duaas made in the post and to the comments here.

You have brought up so many thought provoking points, and like sis Sajeda have brought tears to the eye.

We become so attached to people and develop such love, yet we forget The One who is always there no matter what and will never go.

Please remember me in your humble duaas.
Wassalamualaykum warahmatullah.

Muslim said...

well you know almost 99 percent of women i talk to and i tell them that wearing niqab is wajib they tel me they never heard of such a ruling and they just think its nafl.

Zain said...

As Salaamu Alaykum,

Umm Zahra

Jazakallah for passing by and for the comments.

Jazakallah for the Du'as and may Allah accept them all. Please do continue to remember me and my friend in you Duas.

May Allah give us the understanding and give us the feeling to keep Him as our beloved. Aameen.

Please do remember me in your Du'as and Insha Allah you shall be in my Du'as also.


It is a great concern that many people are either unaware of the correct Islamic Rulings or are prepared to 'twist' or find 'ways' to change the rulings of the Shari'ah in order to suit their own personal needs.

May Allah Ta'ala give us all the correct understanding and furthermore the strength and guidance to accept this understanding as opposed to trying to make out ways to avoid obedience to Him. Aameen.

Please remember me in your Du'as.


muslim said...

salamz,jazakAllah for answering my questions.sorry for bothering you so much wid ma questions,forgive me for the trouble you undertake to get the answers.What shall i tell someone who tells me that everyone allready knows what you look like so what the sense of doing perdah at such a late age?What if you suffer from depression and ure stuck in the house 24-7 and you only get to go out sometimes then is perdah wajib upon you?

*editted by site owner

Zain said...

As Salaamu Alaykum,

Firstly, it was no bother in answering the questions. It was an honour to be able to help.

As for your first question, it should be remembered that Niqab (Face Veil) was made necessary for the people in the time of the Prophet صلي الله عليه و سلم after a period of Prophethood. Therefore, people were already familiar with the looks of other people before Prophethood and even after that.

In conclusion, this is not a valid arguement as things became necessary after a certain time and whatever Allah orders there is wisdom in it.

As for your second question, we should realise that Niqab is an obligation in Islam and Allah does not burden us with more than what we can handle. Therefore, if Allah has made it necessary for us then we should surely be able to adapt to the Niqab and can make it a part of our life.

The removal of Niqab will not decrease nor increase one's depression. As for depression, it is an illness that one needs to give attention to like any other illess.

May Allah make it easy for you.

* As you may have noticed, I have editted your comment because it contained a lot of personal information. I felt it wrong to reveal a lot of information regarding your condition on the internet. However, please feel free to email me if you want, and I will give you an email address of someone you can contact and talk to as well as an answer to all your further questions.

Please do remember me in your Duas.